When life seems impossible
No one cares if you live or die…
Change your hair, show up early
Put out that extra effort, sigh a lot
Dress to the nines and carry a flamboyant book
Make a fancy lunch, eat it lavishly
Sit close to the action sipping expensive water
When they call on you ignore them
Tell them you are working on more important things
While studying offers from their competitors
When they come to escort you out
Speak clearly into your lapel
Asking, “did the cameras get all that?”
Done properly
This should get you at least
Two weeks room and board at state expense.